We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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