Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
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you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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