She said her name was "party"
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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