I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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