what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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