Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize