remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize