So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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