i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize