He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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