I bet he comes in French.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize