is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize