I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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