How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize