Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
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