the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
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