1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
you made out with another girl for some wings
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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