Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize