just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize