she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize