How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
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i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
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We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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