Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize