Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize