Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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