Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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