Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize