thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize