I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize