You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Randomize