I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize