They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
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