Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
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Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
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Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
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