Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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