Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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