I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize