he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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