I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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