I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize