It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I wish I could punch you in the face.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
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