I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
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And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
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It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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