Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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