he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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