Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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