he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
How did I end up in the pool?!
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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