the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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