So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
We need to rekindle our bromance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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