I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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