Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize