im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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