i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize